Saying-Stop-crop-e1417544982110The things you really need to know about sexual assault don’t include fighting, eye strikes, groin strikes.

Most of what you need to know is all about awareness and common sense.  This situation is horrific when you think about it, can you imagine having to live through it and survive it?   But before it happens, usually several things take place that if you recognize these things you can prevent it at any point before it moves to completion.  However, the closer completion of the act is, the harder it will be to stop it and the more scarier it becomes.

The first thing you need to know is this:

The surprise stranger sexual assault is very very rare.  This is the one where the guy comes out of no where and tackles or knocks the girl unconscious or into compliance and completes the act.  These do happen but are rare because the predator wants an easy target and goes through a process to determine if the target is acceptable or not.  In these instances that fit this surprise come out of know where attack,  the victim usually wasn’t aware enough to see the threat and the warning signs before it happened.

The second thing you need to know is:

Drugging of drinks and food do happen and happen often, these drugs will take away the ability to reason, fight and essentially make the person submissive to whatever the predator wants to happen.  Common sense needs to be in play here, make sure you know where your food or drink comes from and who has had access to it.  Pay attention to the environment you are in, are you in a bar, a house at a party etc.  At a bar this is less likely to happen but at a house party the likelihood increases.

The next things you need to know are:

  1. A Predator watches for passive behavior or behavior that shows an easy victim.  These can be general shyness, being unaware, drunk or high, occupied by technology etc.  They look for something that can give them the upper hand to get control and make the victim submissive very quickly.
    1. Have you ever had that I am being watched feeling.  If so look around and if you identify someone looking at you make sure you know that they understand that you are aware of them.  You will be able to tell the difference between the flirty guy and the creepy guy by how you feel and what mannerisms they are exhibiting.
  2. Verbal or close up interview, they may come up and talk to you to verify that if what they observed was correct.  They may use words like we and let’s, or other words and phrases that will seem to put the potential victim in the same metaphorical boat as they are.  They want to break down the walls further and develop trust.
    1. In the contact situations listen to your feelings if you feel creepy or nervous there is a reason for it, listen to those feelings and move on.
    2. This whole engagement may be innocent and harmless but it may not, you need to observe and not act to hastily, be cautious and smart.

3.  The next step is compliance and this may happen within seconds of #2 or days or weeks.  But it will happen eventually and when it does you may need to fight.  The bad guy most often will try to use just words to intimidate and threaten, then move on to physical  tactics like punching, slapping etc.  A weapon may be present here also.  Remember that the time between 1 and 3 may be seconds to minutes to weeks.  It depends on the predator and how methodical they want to be.

4.  If you have encounters with guys that seem to be to good to be true, be cautious.  Also if something seems out of place be cautious.  If they act like they know to much be cautious.  If you feel creepy be cautious.  If contact is made in an unusual place be very cautious.

5.  When you need to fight you will know.  First thing about fighting is do not flail.  Attack 2 to 3 specific targets.  First is the eyes, then the groin then the neck or throat.  Use strong strikes such as Knee.jpegeye gouges, knee or groin kicks and hand strikes to the front and side of the neck.  The next thing you can do for close quarters is pinching, biting, pulling, tugging and similar attacks.  These should be used to get space to hit the eyes, groin or neck and then get away.

Being aware of what is going on around you is essentially the key to prevent sexual assault.  You have to observe, listen to your feelings, watch people and always pay attention to everything.  When you act assertive you are less likely to be a target so let’s learn how to be assertive.  Give me a call and I can help.